Christmas cold

Dear Cold (that's "cold" as in coughing and sneezing, not it's chilly outside),
You have impeccable timing. First of all, I do want you to know that I appreciate you postponing your arrival until the last day of school this year. I don't think I could have handled 130 8th-graders sugared up on candy canes and the anticipation of winter break for the entire week if you had shown up any earlier. Given that, I am definitely not thrilled to have you hanging around again. Don't you realize it is two days before Christmas? I have things to do, parties to attend, meals to make, food to eat, friends to see, beverages to drink, and family to hug. It's a time to celebrate not sleep, which is really what I want for Christmas right now. You've made an appearance and now you must leave. My head needs to clear out of this fog, and my nose needs to heel. As much as I admire Rudolph, I'd prefer it if I did not look like him. Therefore, I'd greatly welcome your early departure. And when you leave, please take all of your germy friends with you. I thank you in advance for your cooperation. Now that we have come to this understanding, I am sure we will both have a merry Christmas.
Sincerely,
Running Nose Stuffy Head